Oh how much I love writing about this topic. It actually feels quite funny to write about this, considering the fact that I am a single lonely child of working parents, who lived in a back of beyond place in Chennai. The only times I had interactions with my cousins, my aunts and uncles were during festivals or family functions where we used to cling on certain stupid details and brag about it, just for show off sakes. Something like, "oh I have that dress that Madhuri Dixit wore in that movie Tezaab for that dance number Ek, Do, Teen"... to "I went swimming in Marina Beach and swam for some 3 kms"... to "I found a biig snake in the bathroom and I caught it myself, thre it out of the door and it went away". Simple things to impress the kiddos of the house. And these kids would stare in amazement and probably talk about this to everyone in the village.
Anyway, I always felt that living in a joint family was such a great feeling, no body would bother you, you could just hang around and play pranks, no one would question you why you did this and that, and if at all they did, you could just put the blame on someone else. Wow...what a nice feeling! And one thing about a joint family I thought rocked was how uncles would take all children for ice cream in the evening, and how you could wear your cousin's clothes and show off in school the number of dresses you had and the variety. Very nice indeed.
I have this colleague who lives in a joint family, asouth Indian, a tam bram to be precise...and she complains about how difficult and irritating it is to live with a bunch of pattu paatis, ambi mamas, subbu chittappas, vijaya paatis, kannan perippas, lakshmi mamis, etc. And this crazy amount of cousins. The amount of answers one needed to give if they wanted a night out with friends. Or the kind of clothes one needed to wear at home and while stepping out...all screened and canned properly. And also the kind of gossip and 'poking nose' that happens.
Oh my god! Thankfully I dont have to be subject to all these. Thankfully now I have grown up I guess. Thankfully!
2 comments:
Happened to pass by :-)
Technically speaking I've never lived in a joint family myself...but for a while had an elderly uncle live with us and sometimes cousins/aunts/their husbands who seemed to prefer my mom's cooking so much that they'd stay for years! And our house felt like a camping ground. When I was small it felt nice to have so many people to hang out with...but later I realized the burden it was on my parents, specially on my mom taking care of so many extra people on a limited salary.
Now, once in a while I too have visitors who stay for 3 months at a time :-)It can get very taxing...not just finacially but with physical and emotional space too!
There's a reason why joint families are crumbling all over India!
Happened to pass by :-)
Technically speaking I've never lived in a joint family myself...but for a while had an elderly uncle live with us and sometimes cousins/aunts/their husbands who seemed to prefer my mom's cooking so much that they'd stay for years! And our house felt like a camping ground. When I was small it felt nice to have so many people to hang out with...but later I realized the burden it was on my parents, specially on my mom taking care of so many extra people on a limited salary.
Now, once in a while I too have visitors who stay for 3 months at a time :-)It can get very taxing...not just finacially but with physical and emotional space too!
There's a reason why joint families are crumbling all over India!
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