She has always been thinking, why does a break-up or the lack of one feel so difficult? A lack of one because there is no clarity whether she could call the recent fiasco a break-up or just a misunderstanding. She told a friend the other day that she was confused. But who knew that she was silently speaking to herself looking into the mirror about what went wrong and why things were this way when they were not meant to be. "I am sorry, I shouldn't have asked you all those commitment related questions", she says tearfully. She secretly wishes her voice be heard in her lover's apartment. She secretly hopes that he would call her one day or gives her that surprise she has always been waiting for.
Is the lack of personal space the issue? Is the misunderstanding from a recent travel the issue? Infidelity? Immaturity? Or what is it? She fails to understand. She has always been immature in handling certain topics, but thats how she is, and he knew that. Then why all of a sudden this lull? She recently had this long talk with him about certain issues she had in her head. And all that she thought was cleared with one phone call. She knew that this was all he could offer to her at that point in time. Yet she wanted to know what the future held for them. It sounds silly now but it was important for her to know.
Well, whatever the reason is, she still doesn't know why there has suddenly been this 'no-communication' phase. It is painful, it is sort of an emptiness she is feeling now. And she doesn't know why.
May be its destiny, she concludes. But she still patiently waits for him to call. May be she wants the answer. Or may be she wants that one concluding call.
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